Thirstdays

Why am I finding it so hard to express myself this morning I am so much better than ever before and still I doubt my own ability. I am holding on to things that are in the past when I should just let go. I am hearing what they say and I just can't make a sound, but why should I listen to the problems of others? Okay I got that out of my sytem and it is Thursday I like this girl and she is so far away never even met her but her smile is just so contagious. I am a very difficult person and also very picky when it comes to the standards I set for myself. As a guy I have a picture of the woman I want in my head I have designed her in my mind all the qualities I want, but I sometimes forget that I won't find that specific woman perhaps some of her qualities, but not all of them. Where do you draw the line in terms of leniency as to what you can sacrifice in what she lacks according to your perfect woman you had been looking for. I am 27 had only one relationship and it was bad for me and I knew it when I got into it but I still went ahead and jumping haed first into the deep end off the cliff with sharks circling in the water below instead of just dipping my toe's into the shallow end. I am still in search of that woman and I know that dreaming or thinking about her won't bring her into existence so I have to go out there and test the waters. I am generally a lazy when it comes to relationships I enjoy my time as it is just that my time maybe I am just not ready or will never be maybe I have another calling? I am off Later Bloggers!!! Oh and HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO MY GRANNY 98 YEARS WILL I EVER See it?

Time for a Celebration

April 26 Monday. I am having a birthday today and you know you getting old when your own mother forgets it is your birthday. I am going to try have a good day I don't think I am going to party much as I did last year I am kinda partied out and all that and you know as time goes by we all have different priorities as we age. So I am going to try and celebrate quietly Later Bloggers!So I hadsort fo a good day with my lawyers seems like things are all coming together one thing at a time I have plans to make this year a success and they say it is a good sign when it rains on your birthday. I also got a visit from a former colleague of mine Victor a real cool dude, struggling kind of at the moment, but I am trying to help him

Sunday Morning Early Out on The Road...

Late Nights watching tv and early mornings driving. So I had plans to call up some of my old soccer teammates who well has put his amateur soccer career on hold to be a Dad. I on the other hand much younger than most of the guys I use to play with, still has a good shot at making it. I was still in primary school when I played for Tlhabane Blizzards fc infact I was nearing the end of my primary school and starting High School. I am on the verge of starting a team of my own which I will mostly use to focus on youth development as the local controling body is non existent. I am part of that ageing group of players left to die with our hunger for professional soccer while the so called authority slept with swollen bellies rich off our money intended for nurturing the grass roots. To be continued...

This follows on my previous post

... My legs would cramp and I would continue running until the cramps would dissapear. I use to challenge myself and would motivate some of the other players to give more. I would always pick the guys who weren't that good in order for me to take on a more responsible role taking charge me the game by controlling the play. I would have more me the ball and this made me eight for the ball this war my property and without it at my feet I war powerless so I fought and fought for the ball. This is what the World Cup should represent for each and every player you get to play in it only once in your lifetime if you a soccer player and if you lucky enough you get a couple more tries at it but only that once should be enough to motivate you to wanna play another if you don't win it at the first effort. I am really getting the bug that bit me when I saw my first World Cup game in 1990 and it is in my back yard this time. I am set on making it to the world cup as a fan and maybe as a player one day! Later Bloggers!

More Soccer Tips to come. I want to use this opportunity...

I am too emotional to make or give positive information. The World Cup is drawing nearer and nearer and I an beginning to realise World Cup? This is not just the World Cup it is bigger than that this is where men become Gods and it takes that type of man to go to war with all the fibre of wots entire being and those of the whole Universe. Wot hot to be mentally capable of taking yourself, no elevating yourself, spiritually above what your body is capable for 90 minutes you have to put all all your fears aside you have turn your weaknesses into your strengths for upon your shoulders rest the hopes me me entire nation. I wonder if the South African national team realizes this I wonder if they realize that they cant just settle for competing in the World Cup. This is one me those moments where you play like, your life depended on it and that half measures just wont do. I remember as a lie playing soccer at school just for fun, but being born with a competitive nature I would play until my lungs would burn

The End of the week and the Beginning of the Weekend.

It is Friday morning and I am in the taxi on my way to work I am a tad bit late, but earlier than most and I got one motivating factor in mind 2 more days till I am off. Hopefully business will be good today? I know I know, I didn't forget about today's Soccer tips will update them as the day goes on later Bloggers have a good one!

Back to Basics. How to become a professional Soccer player part 1

How to become a Soccer player, well you gotta show some dedication make sure you get as much practice as possible. Eat, Sleep, Breath and play soccer at all times. Find yourself a player on which you can model your game. Think as he would think, practice like he would, live like he would and imagine you are your favorite player mental preparation is the most important part of the game and is 80 percent of the battle already won. I have played and practiced in almost all four positions as they would say and have experience in all those positions but I say the fifth position is the bench. I say they are all important especially the bench as it requires the most mental strength and hardwork. I an a striker and this position requireds you to be most unsettling as you need to be able to mentally break your opposing defenders concentration. You have to be strong, fast, smart, good in the air and a great passer of the ball and willing to work for your supply of ball. Tomorrow I will cover middle field and defense.

Picture me Rolling...

Okay so I am on a roll today I just struck a nerve with skater any when I called him Avril hahaha, I can sense his irritation through his post on face book generally I can sense these things anyways enough about jellyfish. I just say spongebob square head, nevermind square pants. This guy had a square hair cut talk about a square peg in a round hole. I am utterly bored and sitting here is making me notice things and think of things i.e., I know exactly how I am going to get my skill level up I use to be one of the best players in this whole entire town I am going to use a tennis ball just like I use to at school and get someone to play with. I know what you thinking American Pie, no not that type player. I use to be one of the best soccer players due to the fact that I always had a tennis ball to practice my close ball control. these are some of the things that as I grew up and outgrew and the truth of it all is that once a soccer playeralways a soccer player and another thing soccer players never grow u

Raise your hand if you over three years old and acting really akward

This is a all time high, up early for work and I am still here at home waiting for my brother to pick me up. So I decided to check out facebook and the status updates this morning and this one guys update read and I quote, " Okay people only 3 days till the Kfc next door opens, don't be jealous. " Don't make me laugh, jealous? of what? The fact that you going to be Obese go ahead Samwise Gamgee indulge yourself, I am off to work later bloggers! Okay so I am at work now and this girl walks in here and asks me to heat up her food and I seem to have lost my way of communicating with the fairer sex all I could say was ask if she was tired after she gave a sigh not from being tired probably from thinking is he going to say something worthwhile... Clearly not " you tired? " Wow that was an all time low. I have exceeded myself within a matter of a couple of hours a low and a high all in one day. Great things can be expected of the candidate, excellent verbal skills... I am off much reading to be done "Dracula

Another day on the grind

I just finished work over a quarter of an hour ago and now I am trying to destress by getting some excersize in I got a whole year of training to do if I am going to make it as a soccer player. Work is really slow and I am really getting to learn how to practice patience the hardway. Today was one of those days where I realised that go this line of work you gotta wait for money to come to you, unlike the waitering industry if you wanted money you could turn it up a notch by picking us as many tables as possible and there was never a shortage of girls to flirt with. The way things are currently I find myself in a desert and with no water or food regular cracker wil taste just like heaven, so its a good thing I am laying of the carbs and especially, since I am getting into shape. I spent most of the day reading Bram Stokers'Dracula and trying not to over eat from boredom. Work is monotonous but I chose this, but my hibernation from the mainstream and the people I know will bear fruits when I make my appearance

I can never get that 20 minutes of my life back,but I never regret a second of it

20th of April 2010- This is my first of many stories and I hope that it will truelly inspire and motivate anyone who reads this to lead a positive life and to go out and give to other and make a difference in the lives of those who feel like they have nothing left to offer. I want to use this blog as a tool a voice because sometimes all it takes is a whisper only one word to pick someone up out of their darkness... I remember sixteen days ago on the 4th of April a year ago,My friend and I were involved in a car accident at notorious spot where it is known that many families have lost Sons,Fathers and Friends. I know this because a neighbour of ours lost her son at the same spot and I have witnessed it also. We were hit by a bakkie (pick up truck), the driver of the bakkie skipped a red traffic light and smashed into the passenger sideof my car where my friend was sitting. We were unconscious for roughly 30 minutes and those were minutes stolen from us because in the time we were knocked out, I lost my phone,my ipod and my car was written off subsequently in the process, those are all things that can be replaced. I am emphasizing these things just to show everyone how we value our material things and it seems as if I am complaining about 30 minutes that I lost, but looking at what happend during this time and the fact that I will never know has caused me many sleepless nights. Those thirty minutes I lost, I have lost so many times over and over and so have many of us due to not making use of every minute we have by spending it with people we Love, our pets neglecting important things that we suppose to do by procrastinating. We waste alot of time in life and it all accumulates to what if and regrets, but I see the bigger picture now thost 30 minutes would have been lost anyways at a later stage in my life and comparing that 30 minutes I lost in comparison to IF I HAD LOST MY LIFE? I would have lost way more...
I remember the whole day leading up to the events of my accident, I was working as a waiter at that stage and it was a friday afternoon overcast. I had, had a bad and good day in terms of tips I was doing great. I also had a bad day at the same time at work first getting almost into a fight with one of my colleagues due to the manner of jokes I was teling, my jokes were meant to really irritate everyone that was my main aim it was at the expense of getting everyone pissed off. I knew how to unsettle everyone if I wanted to and I did even before we started the business day I had pissed of managers and waiters alike including the kitchen staff.

I remember I was on a roll, I made alot of money, but somehow only one person unsettled me more than I would normally allow anyone to do not even the Devil himself could do this. I remember this guys face and I will never forget him ever hahaha( Laughing because this guy was my tormentor.He came into the restaurant bout 8 times that day and out of the 8 times he was there I served him 7 times as the other waiter that served him refused to after he didn't tip him at all and neither I got a cent from him and this, I know for a fact was my karma come back to bite me in the rear. I got into a much fouler mood after this guy had come in that day, for after that I faught with everyone. I remember that I worked a double shift that day and never spoke to my ex girlfriend( girlfriend at the time)the whole entire day as I was working really hard the whole time, I never even took lunch because this guy was sitting there with one cup of coffee for like an entire hour and I got a booking of 20 people when I was suppose to be going to lunch and that really pissed me off more. I finished that evening in a really foul mood because I allowed one person to get a hold over me and I let him know it by my reactions,I ended up driving around alone because my best friends Dad whom he hadn't spoken to in a long time came to make peace with him. I was really angry that night and fought with my girlfriend over nothing I went to pick my friend up after he phoned me and we drove around for a long time and he could tell that I was in a bad mood and I will never forget his words man you really LOVE this girl you whipped. Well a while later early in the morning hours we were in the accident, battered and bruised bleading, but nothing broken couple cracked teeth a Harry Potter scar on my friends forehead, I got a nosebleed and a big shiner we wore our injuries proudly. My friend with his 2 blue eyes me with my one I remember people asking us what happened and we would tell them , "We got into a fight with 300 guys, you should see what they look like." Some people especially the girls believed us. I wore my shades everywhere and even went to a rock concert and heard people whispering "It's Travis Mccoy from Gym Class Heroes, but who's the girl he's with?" lol. I even wore my shades at night, telling everyone I am wearing at night coz the sun Never Sets on a Badass!!

All this being said and done I don't have any regrets I lost it all- I got no real friends, no girlfriend her parents hate me, I am sure her cat, her sister, her sisters boyfriend a spineless backstabbing skater who I always tried to encourage and give a ride to their house when he needs a lift, well he can't hate me he hates jocks more and he is to scared to hate me as I am the only real friend he has all her friends they all hate me-but I gained more

I can never get that 20 minutes of my life back,but I don't regret it for one second